kansans from the barren west of the state, to the rancid east of the state have a shared passion. I know you’re thinking it’s jayhawk basketball, but it’s not. The one thing that kansans care about more than anything else is letting you know how much they don’t care. For five years, under the guidance of their dear leader, #KimJongBill, kansas sheeple have repeatedly and feverishly declared how much they don’t care. “Oh, did we have a rivalry with Missouri? I don’t remember. I don’t care. You here me?! I DON’T CARE!!!”
Of course this is complete dogshit. We know it. They know it. Everyone knows it. Most Mizzou fans have played the same broken record of an argument with these sub-human deviants. It goes something like this…
MU Fan: Play us.
kU Fan: No. You left the conference.
MU Fan: Well, so did Colorado, Nebraska, and Texas A&M, but you play all of them, so I don’t see how your argument has any merit.
kU Fan: Well, you guys have been terrible at basketball. Why would we even want to play you?
MU Fan: Because we have a rivalry that dates back to the Civil War and both fan bases would enjoy it. Besides, this is a totally different argument than your original premise.
kU Fan: Well, you left the conference so it’s your fault.
MU Fan: Didn’t we just go through this?
Rinse and Repeat.
Now, after years of declaring no one cares about this rivalry anymore, kansas fans are forced to come to terms with their own stupid Fake News. We are playing in a charity exhibition and 18,000 tickets sold in 15 minutes. Word on the street is that a pay-per-view television deal is about to be struck, and millions of dollars will likely be generated in a single game thrown together at the last minute.
Below is a sample of kansas fans "not caring".
Of course this is complete dogshit. We know it. They know it. Everyone knows it. Most Mizzou fans have played the same broken record of an argument with these sub-human deviants. It goes something like this…
MU Fan: Play us.
kU Fan: No. You left the conference.
MU Fan: Well, so did Colorado, Nebraska, and Texas A&M, but you play all of them, so I don’t see how your argument has any merit.
kU Fan: Well, you guys have been terrible at basketball. Why would we even want to play you?
MU Fan: Because we have a rivalry that dates back to the Civil War and both fan bases would enjoy it. Besides, this is a totally different argument than your original premise.
kU Fan: Well, you left the conference so it’s your fault.
MU Fan: Didn’t we just go through this?
Rinse and Repeat.
Now, after years of declaring no one cares about this rivalry anymore, kansas fans are forced to come to terms with their own stupid Fake News. We are playing in a charity exhibition and 18,000 tickets sold in 15 minutes. Word on the street is that a pay-per-view television deal is about to be struck, and millions of dollars will likely be generated in a single game thrown together at the last minute.
Below is a sample of kansas fans "not caring".
We already know that us leaving the conference is not a valid reason, as this hasn’t created a grudge between kansas and any of the other Big Twelve defectors who successfully found greener pastures. And now, with the incredible buzz surrounding what essentially amounts to a scrimmage, the only other argument (besides their obvious unspoken cowardice and pettiness) that people are indifferent to the rivalry has been shattered as an ignorant weak lie.
kansas must now face a revamped Missouri basketball squad and their own ignorance and malice. The thing they care about most, pretending to not care, has been dealt a death blow. #KimJongBill will be gnashing his teeth in agony when the numbers start to pour in. Millions upon millions of dollars will be raised to help victims of a horrible tragedy… and kansas apparently hates that.
kansas must now face a revamped Missouri basketball squad and their own ignorance and malice. The thing they care about most, pretending to not care, has been dealt a death blow. #KimJongBill will be gnashing his teeth in agony when the numbers start to pour in. Millions upon millions of dollars will be raised to help victims of a horrible tragedy… and kansas apparently hates that.